CIA Goes High Tech to Recruit Cheerleaders

In an apparent effort to compete with military recruiters for 16-year-olds willing to forgo four years of drinking and drama in order to serve their country, the CIA now features a high-tech, yet low-IQ, personality quiz designed to appeal to the pimply-faced, "I watch 'Heroes' every week and wish I could fly" population. So, waste a few minutes and check it out. For the record, I tested as "The Thoughtful Observer," which means I'm totally ready to infiltrate evil lesbian nuke-smuggling rings in Eastern Europe. I got mad skillz.